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| Little Bo Weep on a scoring pass - Photo by Blaine Ewig |
This weekend at the Kitsap County fairgrounds, an amazing thing happened. The juniors took the track in the challenge hall for three full bouts. That's not the amazing thing, nor was it all that out of place. After all, these teams have been competing for years at a very high level. The amazing part? As word spread of the amazing and awesome roller derby happening over on track three, more and more people came over to watch as the Portland Rosebuds and I-5 Roller Girls All Stars showed all assembled just what junior derby is about. In the end, I am told there were more people watching the Juniors play than were in the main hall.
The first jam had Lex Celerator up against Sumthang Sassy. All assembled held their breath to see how the first jam would proceed. Both Lex and Sassy were off like a shot on the second whistle and hit the back of the pack. A scrum ensued and Sumthang Sassy broke out for lead. The race was on, but Lex was sent to the penalty box as she went in for her scoring pass. Sassy took full advantage and put up twelve points.
That was just the wake -up I-5 needed to get their blockers taking aim and three jams later, Dee Stroir would go on a power jam fueled 17 point run of her own, taking back the lead for I-5. They would then keep the Rosebuds scoreless in 10 of the 16 remaining jams in the first half.
Unfortunately for I-5, the Rosebuds had a recipe for stopping their primary jamming weapon. Lex Celerator was held to single pass jams as the Buds' blockers were all over number 18 every time she found the back of the pack. The thing about I-5? Even when you figure out Lex, they have even more to offer. Dee Stroir is a jamming phenom in her own right, and put up a solid 56 points this game.
By halftime, I-5 had extended their lead to 31 at 82-51.
Over halftime, the crowd was buzzing about how great this game was, and how much they were looking forward to the second half, hoping beyond hope that it would continue to be the awesome display of derby skill they had just witnessed for 30 minutes. When the whistle blew and Little Bo Weep went on a 29 point power jam romp, all doubts were silenced. Suddenly, Portland was within 2 points.
A see-saw battle ensued over the next several jams as the lead changed hands three times before Portland began to pull ahead, building up a 20 point lead at 138-118 before Lex Celerator finally broke loose and did what she does best, put up serious jamming numbers. Six grand slams later, I-5 stood with a 10 point lead with the clock winding down.
But Portland was not going down without a fight. Foxy Shazam and Bleeda Ford put up the points as Scream Cheese and Jesus Feist held Dee Stroir to a single point and helping her to trips in the box with some heads up play drawing cutting and blocking penalties.
At 28 seconds left, the score was tied. Lex Celerator sat in the box, taking a two minute penalty for an ejected Dee Stroir. As the whistle blew to start the final jam, Scream Cheese took off and the full packs for both teams fought hard for position. Cheese muscled her way through clean on the initial pass and snagged lead jammer while Lex looked on from the box.
I-5 took the front and sped things up while Portland did their level best to slow things down. making attempt after attempt to single out an I-5 blocker in a trap as Scream Cheese finally made her way to the back of the pack. She made her first attempt, and pulled up short, avoiding a back block as the I-5 pack switched to defense. Another attempt, and another rebuff.
The game clock had wound down, and the jam clock was coming to a conclusion quickly, Cheese finally broke through and called off the game. Everyone's eyes were on the jam ref, who put up two very huge fingers. And the crowd went absolutely wild.
Three cheers for the Rosbuds -
Little Bo Weep - With 57 of her team's points and taking lead in 71% of the jams she was in, this quick-footed jammer is definitely one to watch out for! Inside, outside, counter-blocking through the pack... wherever she could get through, she would!
Scream Cheese - Scream Cheese has reputation for big hits and strong, physical play in the pack. This weekend? She did not disappoint. 5 big hits and multiple jammer stops were enough to get her the top spot for all blockers in the game,
but her clean 2 point jam to win her team the game was just, plain awesome.
Jesus Feist - One of the smartest blockers on the track, this young woman is as jammer's nightmare. She matched Scream Cheese in blocker stats, but hers were more jammer stops. She would slow the I-5 jammers down so others could do the dirty work, then bolt forward to play cleanup in the front of the pack. This strategy was key to limiting the I-5 jammers to short, one pass jams.
Three Cheers for I-5 -
Lex Celerator - Get used to reading that name, because it's going to come up a LOT in derby circles for the next decade or two. Not only did she lead her team in blocker stats, but she outscored everyone with 80 points on the jammer line... and that's in a game where she only broke out for two multi-pass jams!
Hunt-Her Down - Another I-5 star who is going to make an impact for a good, long time, she not only put up solid blocker numbers as usual, but also slapped on the jammer panty for a couple of three point runs.
Kitty Clawberator - A solid blocker and pack player, Kitty seemed to come alive this game, laying down the hits with abandon, including four which had a huge impact along with some great positional play. Portland definitely seemed to bring out the best in her!
This one was an absolute joy to watch, and the crowd coming over from the main hall to see it bore witness to what is being called the best game at Wild West this year. People are beginning to notice the junior circuit, and the future of derby is in some very good hands, indeed!
Yes, I am "borrowing" the system of the great Elwood Bruise. As he has said
"have at it!" I am not feeling all too guilty. basically, a blocker has three
categories: jammer stops, open holes and big hits. Jammer stops have to keep the
jammer from getting through the pack in a significant way.
B -
Big hits are, well, big hits, but they have to be clean and they have
to be significant.
S - Jammer stops have to keep the jammer
from getting through the pack in a significant way.
O - Open
holes are awarded for creating an opening for your jammer to get through.
A - Assists are awarded if you contribute significantly in
a play which gives your teammate the ability to make a big play.
Remember,
this is only based on what I can see. If I missed a big hit for you, I am
sorry!
Portland Rosebuds
Scream Cheese B-5, S-2, O-1, A-1
Jesus Feist B-2, S-5, O-1, A-1
Medulla Oblengotchya S-3, O-1
Vanilla Distract S-2
Cheese Grater of Despair B-2, S-3, O-2
Foxy Shazam S-1, O-2
Sumthang Sassy S-1
Tempest Fugit B-1, S-4, A-1
Lemon Stinger B-2, S-2
The Situation S-1
I-5 Roller Girls
Liv Vicious S-1
Death by Beth B-2, S-1
The Archer B-1, S-3
Gory Locks S-3, O-1
Hunt-Her Down B-2, S-2, O-1
Kitty Clawberator B-4, S-1
Smash Ketchum B-2, S-2
Short Fuse B-1
Audrey Headburn B-3, S-1
Lex Celerator B-2, S-5
Sierrated Blade B-1
Miss B Haver B-1
This time of year, he spends untold hours
tabulating votes and compiling articles on the all stars of the NW, expanding
to doing Montana, Idaho and British Columbia as well as Washington
State. What he does is nothing short of amazing.
