Featured Skater for April 2012 - Jesus Feist!



Jesus Feist gives a whip to Foxy, Photo by Axle Adams

Jesus Feist lit up the actions list last game, and every game I have seen her in so far this season.  Always a blocking powerhouse, her knowledge of derby has grown by leaps and bounds over the past couple of years.  At 15, she looks to be a feared force in the pack for the Rosebuds for quite some time to come!

At the Big O, I had the opportunity to announce with Mike Chex, who declared Jesus Feist to be one of the smartest derby players he has seen.  I must agree.  She has an uncanny ability to stop on a dime, predict where the jammer will be, and help her team get there as well. 

Photo by Axle Adams

Ms Feist kindly agreed to answer some questions, so without further ado, I give you Jesus Feist!

NWJRDBlog: At what age did you start skating?
JF - My first practice was on March 7th 2010. I was 13.

NWJRBlog: So what brought you to roller derby?
JF - My mother Darcie McIntosh, did merch for RCR home team the Break Neck Betties back when the league was in its 1st or 2ond season. She is also friends with former RCR skater Rita Riot. The first bout I ever saw was on June 23 2007. I remember really liking it, but I don't think I ever saw myself playing the sport. Derby wasn’t brought up much after my mom stopped working merch. Until a former classmate and new neighbor (Cheese Grater of Despair) brought up she skated for the Rose City Rosebuds! I knew then that I wanted to join along with my sister Sydney McIntosh (now known as Foxy Shazam). On the day of tryouts, I was really scared and even decided I wasn’t going to skate once we got out of the car. My sister and Grater found me skates to borrow that day and practically forced me on the track. Getting on the track that day despite my fear, was the smartest decision I have ever made.

NWJRDBlog: Before roller derby, did you have any experience playing any other sports? Or did you follow any other sports?
JF - Oh boy did I ever! About 3 or 4 years B.F. (Before Feist) I attempted to play Soccer, Basketball and Volley Ball. To say the least...none of them worked out. I think the main reason I didn’t stick with any of the other sports was the lack of community. We didn’t work as a family or even a team. It was mostly about egos. There was the star player and that was it. The Rosebuds have been my family since day one. They taught me no matter what stepping stone you are at in your roller derby carrier you are an important part of the team. I remember after my first day A-Shock came over to me and gave me a huge hug and told me how excited she was that there team was getting more new girls. That was when I knew I would be skating till I died.

NWJRDBlog: What are some of your favorite memories about skating with your team?
JF - A memory I will carry forever was getting the opportunity to travel with my team to Denver CO, to play the Rocky Mountain Roller Punks! It was such an honor to travel so far with the people I love so much, to play the sport we all live to play. Being able to meet and become friends with skaters our age from further away from our state was unreal. We created new sisters that weekend that we will have forever! Another would be after the I5 vs Rosebuds Bout at WWS 2012. Watching the last jam from the bench and seeing everyone in the building jump up in pure jubilation at the last seconds upon seeing we had won. That feeling right there is beyond anything I have ever experienced. That bout was one of the best bouts you could ever have the honor to skate in.

NWJRDBlog: Who are some of the skaters, junior or otherwise, you look up to?
JF - This one is going to be hard... I look up to so many skaters worldwide. But I have a special place in my heart for my lovely ladies on Rose City! I think the skaters I look up to the most would be my coaches! I am so thankful for every skater that dedicates time to help our Jr teams grow stronger and smarter on the track. Other skaters I look up to a lot would be Cadillac #V8 and Hurricane Skatrina #82 for their physical and just overall amazing blocking skills. As well as Scald Eagle #50 for her heart stopping footwork and agility on the track! I hope to one day have the pleasure of skating alongside these fabulous women!

NWJRDBlog: Which is your favorite team to play against and why?
JF - I don’t know that I have a favorite. I enjoy skating with and against everyone! Though I really like seeing how our team plays against I5 throughout the season. Its always a challenge, you never know what the end score will be when we face each other in battle. Also the girls on that team are just such sweethearts!

NWJRDBlog: I think many people have seen your movies on Youtube. Any plans for a new feature?
JF - Oh man are we really going to break into this youtube thing? Ha-ha :) Yes for those who haven’t seen Ms. Jesus at her finest, I like to dance, and I dance a lot! So much that I decided to leave the camera on one day and crank the radio. This resulted in something so ridiculous that I said “Why not embarrass yourself further and put these videos on Youtube!” As far as a new feature goes, I think more Con Bro Chill and 80’s music videos. That’s the stuff that really gets me dancing!

NWJRDBlog: When you're not doing derby, what do you do for fun?
JF - Well, like I said before, I really like to dance! Belly dancing, and hoop dancing have been something I have been trying to tackle for the past year now. Both are a lot of fun!

NWJRDBlog: What advice would you give skaters just starting out in Jr. Derby?
JF - To every new Jr skater or girls who are thinking of entering the beautiful world of the derbz, first things first, to all those who don’t think they can do it, DONT GIVE UP! This sport is full of so many talented skaters that got where they are now because of years of training! As much as you think Bonnie Thunders was born with a set of mini skates laced on her feet, you are wrong. It takes time, and remember, everyone learns at different paces! Once you reach your skating goals, SURPRISE there will be more to learn! The most important thing is (drum roll)...have fun! It might sound cliché, but really it’s so much easier to learn when you’re in a good mood, and what gets a bigger smile on your face that dancing? Really dancing makes everything better. Keep skating and keep dancing!

Photo by Axle Adams

~ Jesus Feist ;)

Bout preview: KDB vs Rosebuds 4/15/2012

This Saturday, I will be going to bed early. Why??  Because I have to catch the ferry at 8:30 in the morning... to go see the Kitsap Derby Brats defend their home turf, Sk8 Town in Port Orchard, against the the girls in purple, the Rose City Rosebuds! 10:00 am will find me with a clipboard and notebook in hand, ready to watch the action as Red Rager and Scream Cheese battle it out in the pack to give their jammers an opening.

Known for some fierce, smart and physical play, the Rosebuds are going to be a formidable foe.  With one win under their belts against the dominant I-5 Rollergirls, the Buds will want to roll back south with a 2-0 record.  Very heads up play and teamwork in the pack allowed them to shut down their previous opponent, and I will be looking for that to happen again.  Of course, they may have a little more trouble against a larger, more physical team.  Whereas I-5 relies more on speed and finesse (as befits the stature of a lot of their jammers), Kitsap seems to be going more for the Rosebuds style and bringing on the hits.

The Kitsap Derby Brats are really gelling as a team this season, and showed marked improvements between their game against SDB and I-5.  I look for them to continue that trend and give Portland as good as they get in the pack.  In the end, I think this one is going to come down to stamina and penalties.

Ones to watch -

Jesus Feist - I have been very impressed with Jesus thus far this season.  She has got some of the smartest play I have seen and is seemingly expert at causing misses and drawing cutting penalties through her very quick stops.

Mad Medic - This KDB senior is in her last season in Junior Derby, and the experience she has on  the track is translating into some seriously scary skills.  She tends more toward the stops than the big hits, and is a crucial force in KDB's pack.

Kitsap Roster:
AliSin Wonderslam, Champ Pain, Chewbecca, Gaines Slayer, Kae-oss, Krissy Karnage, Little Mean Sunshine, Mad Medic, Punches & Cream, Red Rager, Stabby Gabby, T Pain, Whamsday Adams

Alternates: Battle Kat and Carma Kick Sass

Rosebuds Roster:
Scream Cheese, Eve Iscerate, Root of All Evil, Bleeda Ford, Vanilla Distract, Cheese Grater of Despair, Tempest Fugit, Medulla OblonGotchya, Little Bo Weep, Shank You very Much, Foxy Shazam, Slamnesia, Jesus Feist, Painbow Frights

Alternates were not declared on the roster I received from Portland

Also This Weekend!

The I5 Roller Girls B team is heading to Spokane to bout against the Spokane Pixies!  Look for a guest blogger to bring a recap of that bout! 

I am looking for folks to bring more coverage of the B team and independant junior bouts going on here in the Northwest, because they need some blog love, too!

Featured skater for March: Red Rager!

Red Rager, Photo by Eric Korn

Welcome to the first featured skater article for 2012!  For March, the skater I have chosen is one I have watched develop for the past few years, and who I think has a very bright future in derby, both junior and beyond: Kitsap Derby Brats’ Red Rager.

Red is a leader on her team, offering some intense and intimidating blocking in the pack and acting as a tough, physical jammer when the demand arises.  She was definitely part of Kitsap’s successes last Sunday against I-5.

She also has been spending some time coaching for the Kistap Tootsy Rollers, teaching the next generation of Kitsap superstars.

I had a chance to send Red some questions, which she graciously agreed to answer.  Thanks, Red, and I look forward to see you skating against Portland!

NWJRDBlog:  At what age did you start skating?
RR:  I started when I was thirteen, almost fourteen, in November of 2009 is when I went to my first derby practice and started to really roller skate. It was right after the movie Whip It came out, and I saw the Slaughter County Halloween bout which is what really spiked my interest.

NWJRDBlog:  Before roller derby, did you have any experience playing any other sports? Or did you follow any other sports?
RR: I used to play soccer for a couple years but had to take some time off because of an injury. When I found derby I was already looking at other sports, like football and wrestling to join. It was by chance that I saw Champ Pain at the Slaughter County bout and she told me about Jr. Roller Derby.

NWJRDBlog:  What are some of your favorite memories about skating with your team?
RR:  My first practices are some of my favorites; I could barely skate and looked like a new born giraffe on ice. Then when I finally got the hang of staying up, I was whaled on by all the veterans and they never let up, but they made me who I am and wouldn't change that. There was also a bout last season where our team was skating against I-5, we were so in sync that we felt unstoppable, we lost but we sure played our hearts out. Whenever our team plays well and we can put up a fight against any team those are my favorite memories.

NWJRDBlog:  Who are some of the skaters, junior or otherwise, you look up to?
RR: I look up to any well playing, sportsman-like skater who plays for the love of the sport. I look up to the people who love to play.  Rollen Dirty from Slaughter County was someone I admired before she retired, and Darth Maulher also from Slaughter, she’s unstoppable.

NWJRDBlog:  Which is your favorite team to play against and why?
RR: I would have to say I-5 because they are such a challenge. They pull strategies and plans out of who knows where and it makes us have to rethink our own plans and really live in the moment. They really put us to the test and help us better ourselves. We're also starting to catch up, so watch out! KDB is always ready. ;)

NWJRDBlog:  I noticed you were working with the Tootsie Rollers at the bout last weekend.  What's your favorite part of coaching?
RR:  I love spending time with the girls; they are the highlight of my day. Thunderstuck is a really great coach for them and working with other KDB Brats is really fun. When the Tootsies can pull off what we've been teaching them (like the snowplows and falling small) I'm really proud of our girls and that’s the best feeling.

NWJRDBlog:  When you're not doing derby, what do you do for fun?
RR:  Mostly homework, I have a lot of art projects do and I try to finish those, but my friends and I really like to knit. I'm kind of a hermit and I don't like to leave my house but when I do I like to thrift shop or go to dollar skate night.

NWJRDBlog:  What advice would you give skaters just starting out in Jr. Derby?

RR:  Don't be afraid of the sport, you are the only one holding yourself back. Take chances and treat this sport like any other sport you would play, with respect.

I5 Rollergirls on top with 197-139 win over Kitsap Derby Brats

Photo by Eric Korn

As the game opened, the Kitsap Derby Brats were dancing in front of their bench, their nervous energy spilling out in smiles and funky moves.  Over at the I-5 bench, it was all business as they strapped on their pads and yelled their cheer.  They knew what they were here to do, and they were going to do it.  So did Kitsap, and they were about to show it in some very big ways.  What followed was a 60 minute knockdown fight.

The first jam saw the I-5 bench sending out their usual starter at Jammer, Lex Celerator.  Red Rager stood on the line for Kitsap.  As the whistle blew, Lex was off like a shot... then ran smack dab into a prepped and ready Kitsap wall.  It took her nearly half a lap to finally find a hole, but Red was quick behind her.  Lex managed to time her call well and nabbed three points before the fourth whistle blew.  I knew right then that I was witnessing something awesome.

The next Jam, I-5's Dee Stroir came to the line against Punches and Cream.  She was stymied in the pack while Punches racked up two grand slams.  Kitsap had taken the lead!  Not to be undone, Dee went to the line a second time and came away with a ten spot of her own. 

I5 had the lead, and Lex was on the line.  Normally, this would mean she was about to extend things a bit, but once again the Kitsap pack held and she came away empty handed while Little Mean Sunshine managed four points before calling the jam as Lex Celerator was racing for the pack on her scoring pass.

What followed was jam after jam of the blockers giving all they had while the jammers struggled through.  At the half, I5 had come out on top of that battle 103-59 on the back of some extreme precision on the part of their blockers and some heads up jamming by Dee Stroir and Hunt-Her Down, as well as Lex Celerator despite being held to single passes or no points in 2/3 of her jams. 

The beginning of the second half saw the young women in yellow blasting back, outscoring I5 30-4 in the first 5 jams, reducing the I-5 lead to scant 17 points.  Again, they were able to hold Dee and Lex back for some time, but it wasn't going to last. 

Lex finally broke out for a 20 point scoring tear, followed quickly by Dee Stroir putting up a 25 point power jam blast as the I-5 pack put on a very impressive display of offense/defense transitions, tying up the Kitsap skaters in 1-1 match ups which focused on opening holes and preventing Kitsap from forming their very effective defenses.  While Kitsap was able to bring things back under control, the damage was done.

I5 Rollergirls took the victory lap and the scoreboard read 197-139

The sun setting behind me as I waited for the ferry to take me back to reality, I had a chance to reflect on the game I had just witnessed. Another gem of a bout put on by the NW regional junior derby girls?  Sure, but this one had something more.  This seemed to be a testament to hard work and dedication, of teams coming together and using their training to full benefit, and of two teams giving their all for the sport they love.  When that happens, the scoreboard doesn't matter.  Everyone wins.

Three cheers for I5!
Dee Stroir - Dee Stroir definitely stepped up against the physical play Kitsap was dishing out, effectively counter blocking the initial assault and blasting out with a 67% lead jammer rating and 83 points (top for the team).  She was also a strong presence in the pack at blocker, lending to her teams efforts in a very significant way.

I5 pack swarms Punches and Cream.  Photo by Eric Korn

The Archer - As I said in the preview, once she gets the derby feeling and gets her skates under her, this skater would break out in a big way.  That she did with a team leading 6 blocker stand-outs and some impressive turns as jammer.  Her pack work is what earns her the second cheer for I5 and earned her the third MVP in as many games.

The I-5 Pack - Sometimes in a game, things just seem to all come together, and that is so often true for the pack work of I-5.  Their uncanny ability to shift seamlessly from offense to defense, then back again is a sight to behold.  That ability is truly what gave I-5 this victory as a team.  For that reason, I am giving the third cheer to the blockers at large.


Three Cheers for Kitsap!
Little Mean Sunshine - This young skater has really come far and has stepped into a star jammer role with gusto.  Against one of the toughest packs in the region, she managed an amazing 50 points and a 57% lead jammer rate.  Add in some heads up play in the pack and she more than earns her cheer.

Dee Stroir stopped by Kitsap blockers.  Photo bt Eric Korn

Gaines Slayer - Gaines Slayer was a one woman wrecking crew, sending skaters flying and making sure her jammer got through or stopping I5 jammers.  She was a definite part of the successes Kitsap had in holding back the I5 tide.

Red Rager - Where Gaines was knocking them down, Red Rager was setting them up.  Excellent pack play on offense and defense along with her 8 turns as a very physical jammer (for 17 points) earn her a top spot in this post.

It's always nice to have help when I am covering a bout.  A huge thank you to Rockin' Red of the SDB Galaxy Girls for helping me by keeping the score sheet for Kitsap during the bout, allowing me the leeway to do the blocker stats!

And now, the blocker stats! A blocker has three categories: jammer stops, open holes and big hits.
B - Big hits are, well, big hits, but they have to be clean and they have to be significant.
S - Jammer stops have to keep the jammer from getting through the pack in a significant way.
O - Open holes are awarded for creating an opening for your jammer to get through.
A - Assists are awarded if you contribute significantly in a play which gives your teammate the ability to make a big play.
Remember, this is only based on what I can see. If I missed a big hit for you, I am sorry!

Kitsap Blocker Stats
Gaines Slayer B-3, S-1. O-1. A-1
Red Rager B-1, S-3, O-2, A-1
Whamsday Addams B-1, S-1, O-1, A-2
Mad Medic B-1, S-1, O-1, A-1
Chewbeca B-1, S-1, O-1, A-1
AliSin WonderSlam B-2
Aqua Knock U Out B-1, O-1
Punches N Cream S-1, O-1
Quarter Pound'Her B-1, O-1
HanaBULL the Cannibal S-1
Kae-Oss O-1
Little Mean Sunshine O-1

I5 Blocker Stats
The Archer B-2, S-3, A-2
Hunt-Her Down B-2, O-1, A-2
Audrey Headburn S-1, O-1
Dee Stroir B-1, S-1
Lex Celerator S-1, O-1
Smash Ketchum B-1, A-1
Sierrated Blade S-2
Lip Smack-Her A-1
Short Fuse S-1
Miss B Haver A-1
FeeBeeSting A-1

Bout Preview 3/25: I5 Rollergirls v Kitsap Derby Brats

After having finally recovered from the awesomeness that was the Wild West Showdown, two A teams will kick things off here at the end of March.  March 25th will find the I5 Rollergirls motoring over to Sk8 Town in Port Orchard at 4:30pm to take on the Kitsap Derby Brats.

I5 was handed a narrow defeat at the hands of the Portland Rosebuds, and I know that Kitsap was there watching and dissecting what was working to contain the crippling speed and grace of the I-5 jamming juggernauts: Dee Stroir and Lex Celerator.  The Brats also had a much needed win over Santa Cruz that day and are pumped up and ready to take on I5.

For their part, I5 is looking to put another one in the win column and continue their quest for a top seed in July.  They are busy doing what they do best, working hard on derby fundamentals and teamwork.  The walls that were rock hard against the Galaxy Girls were rocked hard in their loss at Wild West. I'll be very surprised if they haven't been working  to see those solidify.

Ones to watch
Kitsap's Red Rager returns to the track after being sidelined by an injury for Wild West.  She spent a lot of time watching both her team during their bout and watching the I5 bout.  Given her experience in the junior corps, she's bound to put all of that to god use.

For I5?  Watch out for The Archer.  A speed skater fairly new to the derby scene, she's got a bit more size than the other I5 jammers.  She's already getting respect from the other teams for her work in the pack, though she hasn't really broken out on the jamming scene as yet.  I expect she is going to be a solid triple threat pretty quickly!

Kitsap Roster:
AliSin WonderSlam #106, Aqua Knock U Out #33, Battle Kat #1864, Bekah Body Chekah #807, Chewbeca #52, Cookie Dozer #00, Gaines Slayer #888, HanaBULL the Cannibal #9000, Kae-Oss #84, Little Mean Sunshine #5, Mad Medic #911, Punches N Cream #TK0, Quarter Pound'Her #25, Red Rager #17, Stabby Gabby #71, Whamsday Addams #1313
Alts
HanaBULL the Cannibal #9000
Karnage #626





I-5 Roster
8 Miss B Haver, 9     Audrey Headburn, 12   Lip Smack-Her, 14  Short Fuse, 15  Pit Bully, 18  Lex Celerator, 21  FeeBeeSting, 24  Smash Ketchum, 25  Sierrated Blade, 27  The Archer, 35  Hunt-Her Down, 52  Death by Beth, 55  Karmic Death, 91  Dee Stroir
Alts 5 Gory Locks, 22 Jess Trippin

Galaxy Girls hold off Reservoir Dolls comeback 172-145

Enurgizer Bunny on a scoring pass - Photo by Frank Blau

After the spectacle that was the Portland v I-5 bout, the crowd took a collective breath and settled in for another hour of junior derby action, this time with the Seattle Derby Brats Galaxy Girls taking on the Reservoir Dolls of the Eugene Junior Gems.  Two well matched teams, they also delivered on the promise of exciting roller derby!

The first jam saw Killa Kandy line up against Lilly Lightning.  Both were off quickly, Lilly finding her way through the pack first and snagging lead.  Killa was hot on her heals and the first jam was forced to be called 0-0.

Neal Cassady and Flyin' Hawaiian took the line next, both hoping to be the first to put the points on the board.  This time, the Doll's pack held firm, stopping Flyin' long enough for Neal to get a good lead, which she used to her advantage to put the Dolls on the board 4-0.

The Galaxy pack decided that was enough for now.  Assisted by penalties and heads up jamming, they held the Reservoir Dolls scoreless over the next 6 jams while racking up a VERY impressive 62-0 scoring run before Killa and Neal began the long road back, but the galaxy Girls put the breaks on again and went on another 27-0 tear, extending their lead 89-20.

Then Lilly got ejected.  The call was a bit of controversy as no one on the floor seems to have seen it.  While lining up for a jam, the refs said Lilly kicked her opposing jammer.  In addition, she had apparently made contact with the OPR twice while on her way to the box.  Whether these things happened, I cannot say, but the end result was an ejection for gross misconduct which seemed to rattle the Galaxy Girl confidence.  The Dolls managed to outscore them 36-11 in the remainder of the half.  When the first 30 minutes expired, the girls in black and silver were holding firm at 100-56.

The second half saw the Galaxy Girls with a changed up jammer rotation.  Enurgizer Bunny, a phenomenal jammer in seasons past and a wonderful blocker found herself with the star on her head, taking a good portion of Lilly's load. While the bench reconfigured, the Eugene offense was inching slowly closer, pulling within 30 points before both packs solidified.

The Galaxy Girls began going for the quick, single pass jams which is the hallmark of good, lead protecting roller derby.  The pack would hold back the Eugene jammer long enough for their jammer to get lead, then call it off as they approached the back of the pack.  The lead was extended back to 41 points before Flyin' Hawaiian landed herself in the penalty box, allowing Killa Kandy to go on a 28 point power jam, pulling to within 13.

The Reservoir Dolls were fighting hard, but the penalties of their own were beginning to pile up.  Blocker extraordinaire, Rattle Skate fouled out, as did Spunkee Bruizer, severely hurting the Reservoir defense.  The Galaxy Girls started to pull away as the clock was winding down.  The final Jam saw Bunny in protect mode, making a single scoring pass, then running out the clock before calling the am and the game with a final score of 172-145.

Three Cheers for the Galaxy Girls

DisLykeHer - Always a solid jammer, DisLykeHer held the floor after Lilly's ejection, putting up an SDB leading 56 points.  With four multi-pass jams in this game, she was a force to be reckoned with for the Reservoir Dolls pack.

Rosie D Kream-Her - A perennial force in the pack, this blocker put up some very impressive numbers this game, both with the big hits and jammer stops.  It is  a pure joy to watch her work.

Rockin' Red - Most of the time red works inside the pack, putting up assists and stops as part of the wall.  This time, she did that as well as delivering some huge, clean hits.  Her aggression was very much in evidence this game!

Three Cheers for Reservoir Dolls

Killa Kandy - When I first saw Killa last season, I knew she was going to be one to watch.  Last Sunday, she proved she had come into her own.  A game leading 67 points on the jammer line gives her the first cheer for Eugene.  Well done!

Spunkee Bruizer- While Spunkee did eventually foul out, on her way she was an imposing presence in the pack, stopping jammers on defense and opening holes on the offense.

Bahr Fight - Bahr tied Spunkee for blocker stats, but where Spunkee tended towards stops, Bahr tended towards huge hits.  She definitely punished jammers on their way through, recycling them with awe-inspiring impacts.

There you have it!  Three awesome games of derby under one roof.  A huge thanks to all of the people who helped with score-keeping (Charles Conston, James Webster, Red Rager, Heather and Alora).  I could not have done it nearly as well without you!  I would be remiss if I did not say thanks to all of the skaters and coaches.  The work you do makes the game the awe inspiring spectacle it is.  People are beginning to take some serious notice.



Spunkee Bruizer vs Lilly Lightning  Photo by Tom Booth

And now, the blocker stats!  A blocker has three categories: jammer stops, open holes and big hits.
B - Big hits are, well, big hits, but they have to be clean and they have to be significant.
S - Jammer stops have to keep the jammer from getting through the pack in a significant way.
O - Open holes are awarded for creating an opening for your jammer to get through.
A - Assists are awarded if you contribute significantly in a play which gives your teammate the ability to make a big play.
Remember, this is only based on what I can see. If I missed a big hit for you, I am sorry!

Galaxy Girls
Rosie D Kream-Her B-3, S5
Stella Mental S-2
Random Max of Violence S-2
Enurgizer Bunny S-2, O-1, A-1
Tina Angst S-1, O-1, A-1
Rockin' Red B-5, S-1, O-1
Evil O B-1, S-2
Evil Mac'Nevil S-2
Poison Izzie B-1
Flyin' Hawaiian B-3, S-2
Mal Intent S-1

Reservoir Dolls
Spunkee Bruizer S-3, O-2
Psycho Crash B-1, S-1, O-1
Beautiful Deadly B-1, S-1, O-1
Rattle Skate B-1, S-1
Bahr Fight B-3, S-1, O-1
TinkerHell S-3, B-1
Tie Die S-1
Neal Cassady S-1

Rosebuds over I-5 All Stars 163-161 in epic clash

Little Bo Weep on a scoring pass - Photo by Blaine Ewig

This weekend at the Kitsap County fairgrounds, an amazing thing happened.  The juniors took the track in the challenge hall for three full bouts.  That's not the amazing thing, nor was it all that out of place.  After all, these teams have been competing for years at a very high level.  The amazing part?  As word spread of the amazing and awesome roller derby happening over on track three, more and more people came over to watch as the Portland Rosebuds and I-5 Roller Girls All Stars showed all assembled just what junior derby is about.  In the end, I am told there were more people watching the Juniors play than were in the main hall.

The first jam had Lex Celerator up against Sumthang Sassy.  All assembled held their breath to see how the first jam would proceed.  Both Lex and Sassy were off like a shot on the second whistle and hit the back of the pack.  A scrum ensued and Sumthang Sassy broke out for lead.  The race was on, but Lex was sent to the penalty box as she went in for her scoring pass.  Sassy took full advantage and put up twelve points.

That was just the wake -up I-5 needed to get their blockers taking aim and three jams later, Dee Stroir would go on a power jam fueled 17 point run of her own, taking back the lead for I-5.  They would then keep the Rosebuds scoreless in 10 of the 16 remaining jams in the first half. 

Unfortunately for I-5, the Rosebuds had a recipe for stopping their primary jamming weapon.  Lex Celerator was held to single pass jams as the Buds' blockers were all over number 18 every time she found the back of the pack.  The thing about I-5?  Even when you figure out Lex, they have even more to offer.  Dee Stroir is a jamming phenom in her own right, and put up a solid 56 points this game. 

By halftime, I-5 had extended their lead to 31 at 82-51.

Over halftime, the crowd was buzzing about how great this game was, and how much they were looking forward to the second half, hoping beyond hope that it would continue to be the awesome display of derby skill they had just witnessed for 30 minutes.  When the whistle blew and Little Bo Weep went on a 29 point power jam romp, all doubts were silenced.  Suddenly, Portland was within 2 points.

A see-saw battle ensued over the next several jams as  the lead changed hands three times before Portland began to pull ahead, building up a 20 point lead at 138-118 before Lex Celerator finally broke loose and did what she does best, put up serious jamming numbers.  Six grand slams later, I-5 stood with a 10 point lead with the clock winding down.

But Portland was not going down without a fight.  Foxy Shazam and Bleeda Ford put up the points as Scream Cheese and Jesus Feist held Dee Stroir to a single point and helping her to trips in the box with some heads up play drawing cutting and blocking penalties.

At 28 seconds left, the score was tied.  Lex Celerator sat in the box, taking a two minute penalty for an ejected Dee Stroir.  As the whistle blew to start the final jam, Scream Cheese took off and the full packs for both teams fought hard for position.  Cheese muscled her way through clean on the initial pass and snagged lead jammer while Lex looked on from the box.

I-5 took the front and sped things up while Portland did their level best to slow things down. making attempt after attempt to single out an I-5 blocker in a trap as Scream Cheese finally made her way to the back of the pack.  She made her first attempt, and pulled up short, avoiding a back block as the I-5 pack switched to defense.  Another attempt, and another rebuff. 

The game clock had wound down, and the jam clock was coming to a conclusion quickly,  Cheese finally broke through and called off the game.  Everyone's eyes were on the jam ref, who put up two very huge fingers.  And the crowd went absolutely wild.

Three cheers for the Rosbuds -

Little Bo Weep - With 57 of her team's points and taking lead in 71% of the jams she was in, this quick-footed jammer is definitely one to watch out for!  Inside, outside, counter-blocking through the pack... wherever she could get through, she would!

Scream Cheese - Scream Cheese has reputation for big hits and strong, physical play in the pack.  This weekend?  She did not disappoint.  5 big hits and multiple jammer stops were enough to get her the top spot for all blockers in the game,  but her clean 2 point jam to win her team the game was just, plain awesome.

Jesus Feist - One of the smartest blockers on the track, this young woman is as jammer's nightmare.  She matched Scream Cheese in blocker stats, but hers were more jammer stops.  She would slow the I-5 jammers down so others could do the dirty work, then bolt forward to play cleanup in the front of the pack.  This strategy was key to limiting the I-5 jammers to short, one pass jams.

Three Cheers for I-5 -

Lex Celerator - Get used to reading that name, because it's going to come up a LOT in derby circles for the next decade or two.  Not only did she lead her team in blocker stats, but she outscored everyone with 80 points on the jammer line... and that's in a game where she only broke out for two multi-pass jams!

Hunt-Her Down - Another I-5 star who is going to make an impact for a good, long time, she not only put up solid blocker numbers as usual, but also slapped on the jammer panty for a couple of three point runs.

Kitty Clawberator - A solid blocker and pack player, Kitty seemed to come alive this game, laying down the hits with abandon, including four which had a huge impact along with some great positional play.  Portland definitely seemed to bring out the best in her!

This one was an absolute joy to watch, and the crowd coming over from the main hall to see it bore witness to what is being called the best game at Wild West this year.  People are beginning to notice the junior circuit, and the future of derby is in some very good hands, indeed!

Yes, I am "borrowing" the system of the great Elwood Bruise. As he has said "have at it!" I am not feeling all too guilty. basically, a blocker has three categories: jammer stops, open holes and big hits. Jammer stops have to keep the jammer from getting through the pack in a significant way.
B - Big hits are, well, big hits, but they have to be clean and they have to be significant.
S - Jammer stops have to keep the jammer from getting through the pack in a significant way.
O - Open holes are awarded for creating an opening for your jammer to get through.
A - Assists are awarded if you contribute significantly in a play which gives your teammate the ability to make a big play.
Remember, this is only based on what I can see. If I missed a big hit for you, I am sorry!

Portland Rosebuds
Scream Cheese  B-5, S-2, O-1, A-1
Jesus Feist  B-2, S-5, O-1, A-1
Medulla Oblengotchya S-3, O-1
Vanilla Distract S-2
Cheese Grater of Despair B-2, S-3, O-2
Foxy Shazam S-1, O-2
Sumthang Sassy S-1
Tempest Fugit B-1, S-4, A-1
Lemon Stinger B-2, S-2
The Situation S-1

I-5 Roller Girls
Liv Vicious S-1
Death by Beth B-2, S-1
The Archer B-1, S-3
Gory Locks S-3, O-1
Hunt-Her Down B-2, S-2, O-1
Kitty Clawberator B-4, S-1
Smash Ketchum B-2, S-2
Short Fuse B-1
Audrey Headburn B-3, S-1
Lex Celerator B-2, S-5
Sierrated Blade B-1
Miss B Haver B-1